Days Like This

I recently fed my Muslim friend pork by accident. I'm not much of a cook and I just didn't remember that sausage is the very worst kinds of pig. Like the worst of the worst of pork. And I fed her sausage.

I had to buy sheets so I went to Bed, Bath and Beyond where I discovered that they sell A fitted sheet for a full bed for $90? Really? $90. A pillow case for $20. Already offended by the overwhelming smell of evergreen tree store scent, this just bulldozed its way across my line of decency (no offense to anyone who pay real money for decent sheets, but if you do, I have a Christmas list that is beyond my means and I'd be happy to email it to you).

I feel harassed by Facebook. Everyday it has "suggestions" for me - connect with this person, send a message to that person, poke so and so, etc. The whole point of Facebook is that it allows me to connect with someone without any effort at all, so please no more suggestions that require action on my part.

My car doors froze shut this week. I finally managed to pry the passenger side door open whereupon I crawled across to the driver's side.

And, lastly, I found out that even an octopus has more dexterity than me.